Canada might be the most boring country on Earth. But at least we can be rich. Actually, these ideas will make us rich and exciting.
Super Thrilling Idea #1: Rent-a-Nation
Since we have vast amounts of inhospitable wasteland, we could sell off pieces of our country to people who want to form their own nation but do not have any land (see: Palestinians grow a pair). Just like Israel was carved out of the desert to give the Jews a homeland, we could carve up a piece of Alberta or Nova Scotia and sell it to Super Models, Bankers, Oil Executives, Ex-Dictators in exile, or anyone else who doesn’t want to be surrounded by riff-raff. This could bring in a few billion dollars every year in rent. And would make for some very interesting parade floats during holidays.
Fabulously Ingenious Idea #2: Baffin Prison
Turn the frozen rock known as Baffin Island into the world’s highest security prison. Just like England once sent all their criminals to Australia we could offer Baffin Island as the penitentiary of the world. For example, let’s say it costs the US $40,000 to house a prisoner for one year. For $20,000 we will take him off your hands and send him to Baffin Island. Canada will get rich and crime stats will plunge worldwide if people know they are going to be imprisoned on a large block of ice with no hope of escape. It’s Alcatraz on ice! (Editor’s note: Don’t make it sound like an ice skating musical)
And while they’re up there, they can start drilling for oil and digging for precious metals. Ka-ching!
Brilliant or Stupid? Oh Canada, you're so cute when you try to be cool...
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