Did you know the FBI offers large rewards for the capture of badasses? No silly, not rapper Chris Brown. We’re talking global terrorists. Don’t believe us? Check out this $25 million bounty on bin Laden’s head (an extra $700 if you don’t get blood on his turban).

Well this is your chance to begin scrutinizing that person sitting next to you. Does he resemble a jihadist bent on destroying the capitalist system? You might not think that the collapse of global trade is such a big deal but you’ll be whistling a different tune when you can’t get those yummy Pocky treats from Japan (not to mention hot Swedish meatballs supermodels).

Here’s an idea to help make someone rich and be a hero (and the target of global jihadists, but hey, you can’t have your cake and protect it from honour killings too). Just “borrow” information from the FBI’s most wanted terrorists website to make our own ‘most wanted’ site with a difference: your new site doesn’t just list the mugshots of toothless bearded ones, you collect and disseminate any tips from the public to the law enforcement agencies. When the rewards are handed out, the owners of the site collect 10% of the bounty or ‘finder’s fee’ if you are too squeamish to use such a macho word. So what are you waiting for? Do your part for world peace by sending in the army!

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